Best describes my state of mind at the moment. Feel as if I can't think straight, can't think of the right words to say. It's as if a fog has descended. Not coping with even the most simple stuff. 'Senior moments' are becoming more and more frequent. Recently I've been in a bit of a dark place, for various reasons, and it's affected me in different ways. During a random discussion at work today I happened to say that I find it impossible to relax at any time, which was probably a bit of a shocking statement. On the surface I seem to be this chilled out, laid back, easy going person when I'm really a control freak in a constant state of underlying anxiety.
However, there is so much to be grateful for. Being lucky enough to love (and being loved by) the people who matter. Reasonably good (physical) health. And then the small matter of going on holiday in a couple of weeks. Who knows? I might even learn to relax.
3 comments:
I felt like that a lot last year.Not just mentally,I used to feel sick very often,was so tense that I couldn't stop shaking sometimes,and just generally went about in a daze. Sometimes I think that's just how modern life is- it seems like you're not allowed to relax or have time to yourself,when really,that's all that matters.
I find you tend to just snap out of it eventually,without even doing anything different to what you were already doing.Never underestimate the power of a holiday though- I have never felt as chilled out as I did in Denmark in March,and I'm sure I'm still feeling the effects now!
I hope you feel better soon anyway.
Thanks again :) you really understand it because you've been through it too. I've been prone to depression on and off for a number of years but have managed to avoid it for the past three or four years, so it came as a bit of a surprise that it's back again. However I've beaten it many times before so I know what I need to do.
Definitely looking forward to the holiday (although even that was worrying me because of the high temperatures!) anyway I shouldn't complain because we've got severe gales and rain here today...
Ah, the healing powers of Denmark. Really will need to go there sometime! By the way, I started watching The Bridge but then stopped, decided to record it all and start watching it again from beginning to end, after I'm back from hols.
A busy week ahead, but I'm taking tomorrow off work to relax and recharge.
It's a bit grim down here today too.I've got real holiday envy at the minute,what with you going away and my dad going to Italy today.I've got next Monday off of work but I'll be decorating,so not very exciting :)
Wish I'd have recorded The Bridge actually.I keep reading things on forums and thinking "I don't remember that..." and I can never be bothered to load up iPlayer to check! Can't wait for the big finale this week though.
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