It's beginning to look a lot like chaos

This past week hasn't been the best.  Firstly, my boiler broke down at the start of the week.  As if that wasn't bad enough, my insomnia made a comeback and my sleep routine was seriously disrupted.  So then I sat down to write my Christmas cards for posting, only to discover that my address book has been misplaced, and still not found, causing a great deal of stress. Although I'm beginning to wonder if a lot of people have lost my address as well, as there has been a very minimal amount of cards dropping through the letterbox...!

Then yesterday, right on cue, I took my annual festive season cold which usually makes an appearance every year, either before/during/after Christmas.  My throat is on fire and I'm feeling decidedly under par today.  Bad timing, as there is still so much to do.  I still need to find that address book, and I want to start wrapping presents before the end of the day.

Last week wasn't all bad though.  I went to the office Christmas lunch for the first time in about 3 or 4 years and ended up not only enjoying it very much, but also staying on for a little while afterwards for a nice relaxing chat afterwards with a smaller group of friends/colleagues.

When you don't go to anything, people often misinterpret this as being "anti-social".  It is hard to explain social anxiety and introversion to people who don't understand it.  For some people, party nights are the highlight of the year.  For me, they are a danger zone of noise, anxiety, fear and over-stimulation, and that's why I avoid them.  My ideal social environment is spending time with a small group in a more relaxed situation where you can hear yourself talk and think.

When faced with living on my own, I never thought I would enjoy sitting in silence.  I thought I'd always have to fill they days and nights with background noise, to fill the void of mum not being there.  What I didn't imagine was that I would end up treasuring peace and quiet.  Particularly at this time of year, when the stresses of day-to-day life seem to soar.  Talking of which, I'm off to search for that address book...

We've hit peak Christmas

Last year, in an attempt to avoid the excessive crowds and pre-Christmas rush, we went on our annual journey to the Edinburgh Christmas market at the end of November.  That seemed to work: it was busy, but there was still some breathing space.  

We decided to do the same thing this year and so today we headed for Edinburgh in the hope that we might repeat the more pleasant experience of last November - but we were not prepared for what can only be described as "peak Christmas".  Despite it only being November, the place was jam-packed to full capacity, there were queues to get in, queues to get out, and it was all just....overwhelming.  If that's what it's like now, what's it going to be like in a couple of weeks?

I don't understand this obsession with bringing Christmas forward, year after year, to the point when Christmas season begins right after Halloween.  Forward-planning is one thing and I will admit that I have the bulk of my shopping done by the end of November - after all, who wants to be trailing round the shops in the middle of December? - but is there really any need for people to be putting up their trees, lights and decorations in the middle of November, for example?  Yes, that is happening this year.  There are people in my street who have done just that since over a week ago.   

Still, I'm not going to be too mean spirited about it.  After all, this year has been hideous and anything which can bring a bit of light into our miserable lives should be welcomed, I guess.  We'll just need to have a rethink next year and avoid a Saturday trip to the market.  Or if you can't beat them, join them - maybe Edinburgh should tap into the early-Christmas trend and open the market next October!!

What happened this week?

I came to the conclusion that flexible working may be one of the best things that's happened to me. It's a pleasure working longer days when there is a day off at the end of it.  I had my first day off this week and used my time wisely.  I did some long-overlooked jobs at home.  I went shopping.  I watched some of my huge backlog of TV shows.  Oh, and I even wrote some blog posts.  All in all, a big success.

I also learned that I can cope with these unseasonably below-zero temperatures which we have been experiencing over the past week.  I guess that the built-in menopausal "central heating", which usually has a negative impact on my quality of life over the summer months has been a positive factor in the winter (apart from over-heated public transport or department stores/shopping malls which remain a nightmare).  You would usually expect these temperatures in January, for example, but November has skipped the autumnal and gone straight to winter.  On the plus side, there hasn't been any snow, or sleet, but these days have also been sunny and bright as well, making the extreme cold much more bearable.

Yesterday I was also reminded about how much I hate shopping, something which I once used to enjoy.  The enjoyment has been replaced by tiredness, exhaustion and sheer panic when being confronted with the Christmas shopping crowds.  It would appear that the Christmas season is getting earlier every year as well.  I've seen several houses with all their lights and decorations up since last week.  Oh well, each to their own.

Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same that it ever was

It's Christmas Eve today, I've been on holiday from work yesterday and today, with a mixture of housework, relaxation and naturally some seasonal overindulgence.  This morning I placed the presents under the tree, and what a nice array they are too.  Tonight I'll have my traditional visit from Santa (who looks suspiciously like faithful travelling companion) and we will exchange our presents. Just a normal Christmas Eve then.

Only it's not.  For it is another one of those milestones.  My first Christmas without my mum.  I was dreading it, but surprisingly I am getting through it.  Why?  Well, because along with all the love and kindness she gave me, she also instilled the self-sufficiency and resilience which were a very strong aspect of her personality - and which she also inherited from her mother.  It's those qualities which have kicked in over the past few months and enabled me to deal with the unbearable grief and loss, and also given me the strength to get on with life.  In the same way that my mum did after my gran died.  Because that's what we do: it is our own way of grieving.  Life goes on, and it is to be lived.

We all grieve in different ways, but we still grieve.  Because there isn't a minute of the day when I don't think about her.  There isn't a moment when I don't miss my best friend.  We had so much fun together.  I miss the laughs, and the daft nonsense, the swearing-like-a-trooper at the TV, and of course her love-hate relationship with the Eurovision Song Contest.  There is just this constant emptiness and a feeling of "going through the motions".  But I am adjusting to living on my own, slowly but surely.  New memories are to be made.

But maybe the reason that I don't feel so alone is that I still feel her spirit, her presence here with me. And when I have a good day, I tell her.  When I have a bad day, I tell her that too.  And tomorrow - Christmas Day - I will be going out with faithful travelling companion and his mum for Christmas dinner; a new happy memory to be made.  And there's plenty of other things to keep me going over the next few days - blogging, tweeting and watching foreign telly to name three.  And with Twitter, I'm never alone :)

Among the many sympathy cards I received in the summer, one particularly stood out as it had a poem which particularly resonated with me.  It made me cry floods but it also made me smile too, because every word is so true and I have revisited it many times and taken so much comfort from it over the past 5 months.  And it has helped me to work through my own grief, and helped me to understand that it is ok to smile, and laugh, for she will always be alive in my heart.  If you are reading this post, I hope you can take comfort from this poem too.

An ill week, a happy day, and finally cracking Christmas

If this blog is turning into a rather gloom-laden place then please accept my apologies; rest assured that I want to take it in a more upward direction in the weeks and months to come.

But the past seven days have been an extremely miserable place as last Thursday I fell victim to yet another horrible viral infection, a very similar one to that which I had in June, which had its usual 'leftovers' which left me struggling to get through the week, battling a constant cough as well as the usual sinus hell which these things always leave me with.  As if that wasn't bad enough, my eyes decided to come out in sympathy on Monday. So we can add conjunctivitis to an already growing ailment list.  On a totally shallow note, the worst thing about the eye infection was that I had to go eye make-up free to work for two whole days.  The horror of it! :))  My boss, who I can also luckily call my great friend, had a good chuckle at my predicament, but then she can get away with anything!!

Today I woke up and the red-eye was gone.  Normal Laura was resumed, my trademark eyeliner and mascara back on, and if I can just shake off this horrible post-viral cough all will be well once more. The down-side of the past week has been a loss of appetite and struggling to eat, which is definitely not like me!

For various other reasons, today was a very good day.  I won't go into all of it, as it involves other people whose privacy will remain private, but their happy news made me very happy too.  I also had a brilliant trip to the theatre today, review to turn up eventually (definitely before Christmas) over at EuropeCrazy.

I'm beginning to feel like I'm finally cracking Christmas.  The whole Christmas card writing, and accompanying letters which I always send at this time of year, has turned out to be more therapeutic than I first thought.  I am triggering/grasping opportunities to re-establish broken family links because life is too short and I'm quite frankly fed up of meeting people only at funerals rather than on happier/normal occasions.  I don't know where it's all going but at least I can say that I tried :)

December thoughts

Regular readers of this blog won't fail to have noticed my numerous attempts at trying to lose weight and get fit, whether via an official plan or doing my own thing.

Over recent weeks I've been doing a bit of stocktaking of my life: the things I want or need to change, and also recognising the things which hold me back, particularly through the dark and cold winter months.  I came to the conclusion that I don't need the additional stress of tracking everything I eat and weighing myself every week, especially when I'm in the midst of fluctuating emotions whilst dealing with the winter months - always a danger point for my mental health, and when you pile on the big post-bereavement milestone: Christmas, then something has to be done.

So I have decided to ditch "the dieting", not just for the moment, but for good.  For it is just one more stress I can do without.  Sometimes a little thing is the tipping point for a big decision.  In my case it was a workmate's birthday recently, when there was some delicious home-made cake on the go.  (One of my friends/colleagues is a fabulous baker and she also baked a cake when it was my birthday).  Suddenly I went into "dieting mode" and initially declined the cake.  But then something happened.  For at that moment I decided - why not?  My most successful non-official-dieting phases have resulted from a combination of moderation and exercise.  When I could have my cake and eat it.

The kind of low I'm experiencing now is different from this time last year: where last year was damaging and dangerous at least I had mum.  Now, all I feel is emptiness and a sense of going through the motions every day.  It's as if my feelings and emotions have been ripped out.  It's only when I'm with faithful travelling companion that I'm brought back to life.

Strangely enough, I seem to have morphed into the 'old me' at work, the person who used to be quite upbeat and chirpy. That's maybe just my way of repaying the kindness which everyone has shown me over the last 5 months, and maybe just my way of dealing with day-to-day life.

I had a day off work today and put up the Christmas tree.  Mum was very particular about how the lights were put on the tree, and how the baubles were arranged.  Well, there may have been a slight dip in quality control (and sorry mum, but there's probably a million things I can do better than putting lights on a tree) but hopefully she'll have approved.

We don't have a 'colour scheme' and some of the baubles even date back to the 70s and 80s (yes!) but it will always be "our" tree. Things won't really change this Christmas.  Like mum, I was never really into having a lot of decorations up, so apart from the tree there's only a few little ornaments around the fireplace, including mum's favourite little wind-up snow globe (below) which plays "White Christmas".

The next big task will be sorting out the Christmas card list, something which was always mum's "job" so I'm not really looking forward to it.  At least the cards and stamps are bought.  I've been pretty organised this year and concluded the Christmas shopping by the end of November.

In between all this festive planning, I am looking to the future.  Over recent weeks I started doing up the house, and this will continue in the coming months. Last week I went sofa shopping with successful results - so it will be out with the completely uncomfortable three-piece suite and in with a very comfy sofa and chair in the next 3 months or so.  New furniture and carpets will be purchased, and there is a lot of painting to be done.  So I'll need to keep myself fit for all this hard work ahead. Which brings me back to my original topic.  Without the pressure of counting, tracking and weighing, I might even enjoy the rest of the winter, with the freedom to eat more of what I want (in moderation of course), but upping the exercise as it will be "time to start paying - in sweat!!"

I'm going solo. Oh no you're not! Oh yes I am!

You will have guessed by the title of this post that it's panto season - oh yes it is!  And even if much of the Christmas hype leaves me cold, then there is one particular Christmas ritual which was always the exception: a trip to a pantomime.  That was always my "big day out" with mum. But this Christmas, as with about 99.9% of everything else in my life, it's going to be different.  For I am going to do something which is either brave or crazy or for many people is probably just a no-no.

For I have decided that I'll be going to a panto on my own, over the festive season.  (And don't worry, all is well with faithful travelling companion but 1) panto's not his thing and 2) he has other commitments on my panto day).

It's very sad that society seems to dictate these 'norms' that everything should be done as a couple, a group or a family.  Perhaps those who dictate these norms are maybe just uncomfortable in their own company.  Why shouldn't you go somewhere on your own?  Why should we be denied the right to enjoy entertainment just because we're unaccompanied? There are reasons why - even if we do have someone to go to the theatre with - it's not always possible to hang out with them on a particular day. (Talking of which, apart from the panto, I will be going to another theatre show before Christmas, again on my own).

My mum had a very refreshing "f***-it" attitude to a lot of things: she was so unconventional in so many ways and I guess that's one part of her personality which I'm glad to have inherited.  And even though it's a daily struggle to adjust to living alone, perhaps I've gathered some strength and courage too as I grow more and more used to my own company.  So although it will probably be difficult, walking into that theatre on my own, when the lights go down, it doesn't matter who you are or who you're with.  And as for filling those awkward minutes during the interval, I've got a survival strategy for that too - oh yes I have! - yay for mobile phones and wi-fi :)))

Bad times

It's been 6 weeks now since I lost my mum and, well, it's really kicking in now.  I feel sad, distressed, distracted, and lost.  In the beginning there was important stuff to do, things to be seen to, and not a day went by without some official matter to be dealt with. But now, there is just an undescribable emptiness, and a sadness which is impossible to overcome. Only the love and support of faithful travelling companion, and our impending holiday, is getting me through it all.  But otherwise, over the past couple of weeks I've struggled to get through every day, and this week has been the most overwhelming one yet.  Every moment of every day, I am reminded of how much I miss my best friend.  Particularly when I've had a bad day. In the past I would have come home and she would have given me a big hug and made everything better.  I miss her so much, and getting on with life is turning out to be even more of a challenge than I'd ever imagined.   But that's not really surprising. For it's hard to lose a loved one, but to lose not only your mother but your best friend, whom you've spent your whole life with, is just too much to bear.

Wednesday was particularly difficult, with all the talk at work about arranging a Christmas night out. Regular readers of Random Ramblings will be aware that I struggle with the whole concept of Christmas at the best of times, so needless to say I just can't face the thought of it this year. And I don't do nights out anyway, least of all in a year when my world has fallen apart.  The inevitability of that time of year approaching was enough to tip me over the edge.  There is also one Christmas-related thing which I've been involved in for the last few years, which inevitably dominates (and arguably ruins) the lead-up to the 'festive season' but that is outwith my control,  And I know it's still 19 weeks away, but once you hit August and September then it's downhill all the way.  In past years I've written too much on here about how miserable the lead up to Christmas can be, so I've decided not to mention it so much this year.  And anyway, faithful travelling companion has a plan to get me through Christmas and I'm going with that.

At least I still have blogging to keep me going, so I am planning to publish some outstanding blog posts over at EuropeCrazy in the next week or so, including those long-overdue Eurovision reviews and some other stuff as well.

'Tis the season to be shopping: a Christmas song for 2014

Here is my little Christmas gift to you.  I was inspired to write this little song based on four things:

a)  The retail mania around the festive season
b)  The rise and rise of online shopping while the high street is just a parade of empty shops
c)  The popularity of pound shops
d)  The failure of certain courier companies to deliver Christmas presents on time.

So may I present: "Fair-retail of New York (or anywhere else)"
To be sung to the tune of that perennial Christmas favourite "Fairytale of New York" by The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl.

It was Christmas Eve babe
In the pound shop
But the empty shop next door
Won't see another one

Cause now it's bargain time
And people queue in line
To buy the most they can
With the little that they have

The tills all go kerching
We can buy everything
But it's not so easy now
As times get harder

So happy Christmas
But who'd have seen the day
When food banks fed the starving people in this country

(Shopper) We can buy everything
Hear the tills go kerching
Yet the shops disappoint me, I can't find a thing
When I first clicked that mouse back in 1999
I knew online shopping would suit me just fine

It was easy, it was magic
High street shopping was tragic
You could buy anything
And everything you liked

While the overpriced shops
Had nothing in stock
I decided the high street
Could go take a hike

The boys of the online shopping sites
Still singing hip-hooray
That's where I bought all my stuff for Christmas Day

(Shop owner)  You're a horrible creep
You buy things cause they're cheap
Putting me out of business
And staff on the dole

(Shopper)  You rip off your prices
And now my advice is
To head for the web
In search of a good deal

The boys of the online shopping sites
Still singing hip-hooray
That's where I bought all my stuff for Christmas Day

I could have had it all

I ordered it in time

But there's no delivery van

My stuff's abandoned

They've not delivered it

So how do I explain

That Santa's overwhelmed

And couldn't bring your presents?

The boys of the online shopping sites
Still singing hip-hooray
But the presents won't arrive for Christmas Day.


I hope you all have a lovely Christmas and that Santa's good to you :)))

Ho-ho-no

Regular readers of this blog will be well aware of my ambivalent feelings about Christmas - once it actually comes, I enjoy spending it with my loved ones and of course I enjoy the week off work.

However, the lead-up always feels like someone's got their hands around your neck and squeezing tighter and tighter: the packed shops, the Christmas songs on repeat from October (I feel so sorry for those people working in retail having to suffer all that), the overpriced meals in restaurants, the Christmas lunches/nights out, the forced jollity, the Secret Santas, the pressure which builds and builds due to additional tasks at work, the general view that if you're childless by choice that Christmas is somewhat more worthless for you, need I go on?

But before all that, the first danger signs of the C word appear.  Today I read this and became extremely annoyed: http://www.eveningtimes.co.uk/lifestyle/u/summer-is-over-retailers-put-christmas-cards-on-the-shelves.1407825651

Summer is a very short season in this country.  Can we please, please be allowed to enjoy what's left of it?  It's only August.  The rain may be back, the temperatures plummeting and the nights are getting darker, but officially it is still summer.  We will be in winter soon enough.  I've been reading a lot about mindfulness and the importance of living in the moment, yet no-one told that to the retail industry.  So we have Easter Eggs and Valentine cards in January, summer clothes appearing in February, winter clothes appearing in August, and months of the pre-Christmas hell.  I wish they would stop this acceleration of the seasons.  The only exception to this is, of course, Eurovision season!  That goes on for months and months, and that's just fine by me :)

Tis the season to be grumpy

Apologies for this being a rather long ranting post but I need to get it out of my system.  As I get older I am becoming increasingly more grumpy and intolerant, and I seem to be firing on all grumpy cylinders at the moment. 

And nothing raises my grumpy levels more than this time of year.  Not Christmas itself - I actually love Christmas and if it didn't exist they would have to invent it to brighten up these cold, dark winter days.  However, the irony hasn't escaped me that for what is supposed to be a happy, hopeful and peaceful time, it's anything but.

The torrent of Christmas TV ads with dreary slow songs (a.k.a. "the John Lewis effect") all urging you to spend spend spend, as if that will really make a difference to your life.  TV shows and ads building up an unrealistic expectation of what Christmas should be like, rather than the reality. 

Particularly in these times of economic gloom, Christmas overspending is not only wrong, it's offensive and obscene.  Cash-strapped families are being placed under further stress and resorting to vile moneylenders in the respectable guise of 'payday loans' so that their children won't be bullied at school for having the wrong type of presents.  

Our parents, growing up during and after the war years, literally had nothing.  This period, when all you got in your stocking was a piece of fruit and an annual, or a doll if you were lucky, is often mocked by comedians.  Yet when you speak to those who lived through that time, they have only happy and fond memories of their childhood Christmas. 

Now, people buy televisions for two year old children - WHAT???? - and it seems that your love can only be measured by how many multiples of £100 you spend on someone.  WRONG.  Will they love you any more?  No.  They'll just wait for you to top that, next year. While there are people in the world who don't know where their next meal is coming from.

Then there is the  'I must buy a present for...' syndrome.  Why must you buy a present for some obscure nephew or other?  I'm with the money saving guru Martin Lewis on this one: 'ban unnecessary Christmas presents'.  Give the money to charity instead. 

(Oh and whilst I'm on a rant, if you're clearing out good stuff, give it to a charity shop, rather than one of those places which give you about 50p for 10 kilos or whatever.  I once saw someone I know, who is so well-off she only needs to work part-time, going into one of those 'we buy your clothes for cash' places with bags and bags of stuff.  Is there no limit to some people's greed?)

Then there are the subtle reminders that your Christmas experience is never going to be worth as much as theirs...

"of course you don't have many people to buy for, do you?"
I am regularly reminded that you-are-not-a-parent-therefore-Christmas-is-immediately-devalued.  The "Christmas is for the children" brigade.  There seems to be this notion that Christmas is irrelevant if you live in a child-free world.  Well, it's not.  It's better. 

"of course you're not having a big dinner, are you?"
The subtle reminders that you-don't-have-a-big-family-therefore-Christmas-dinner-is immediately-devalued.  I'm not the person slaving over a hot turkey for hours on end!  (We have never had turkey for Christmas dinner).

The Christmas Card list

As almost all of our closest family relatives are no longer with us, the 'family' is more a group noun for various cousins and second cousins whom you never see from one year to the next.  In fact, they only get in touch with you when there's a family funeral.  Funny how they never get in touch when there's good news! 

But they should know how to spell your surname.  Or at least write the name of the town you live in on the envelope.  Oh, and it would be nice if they told us that they had a new partner so we could include their name on the card.  And one more thing, can they please tell us when they've moved house before we sent their card to the old address?  These are not just hypothetical gripes, they're all true and have all happened to us over the past couple of years.  (Before you suggest 'e-cards', my mum's in charge of the card sending and she'll have none of that). 

The forced jollity

This one's mainly in relation to office night outs. I know it's the season of goodwill and all that, apart from the people you like (who happen to be all the people in my section - yes I'm very lucky) would you really want to be stuck at a table with someone you can't stand?  And what's the point of getting yourself glammed up to go to a night out to eat mass-produced substandard food followed by dancing to the musical equivalent of Guantanamo Bay?  Doesn't sound so appealing now, does it?

Let's get the deccies up!

Last week, the office Christmas decorations were going up and I couldn't even raise a smile, never mind any enthusiasm.  Which is a shame really, as the more enthusiastic and festive members of the team put in a lot of effort and did a great job.  I'm just too stressed, anxious and agitated at the moment to care.  The lead-up to Christmas in my office is always a stressful one, and this year is more stressful than most.  It's been the busiest year I can ever remember, and some of us will still be feeling the fall-out of it for a while to come... :(

Shop till you drop

I've bought most of my presents online this year.  It's the best way to go if you want to avoid the 'joys' of the traditional town/city shopping experience, bad-tempered parents, screaming children and Bing Crosby singing 'Happy Holiday'.  Oh and if you need to go to Primark, you'd better be prepared to queue just to make your way from one end of the shop to the other!

All these rants aside, I do love Christmas.  Because the best Christmas is what you make it, the one that makes you happy, the one that is on your own terms, not the one that people think you should have.  Now, I'm off to wrap a few (necessary) presents!

It's a no from me for the eggs factor*

Christmas time, mistletoe and wine. It was fun, but it was all gone in a flash, just like the Christmas trees which were blown down in Tuesday's 100 mph gales. Although our local Christmas tree defiantly remains upright and fully lit!

Even though a few hardy souls still have their trees up and strings of lights round their windows, most of the motorised reindeers have nodded their last, the trees and baubles are put away, we marvel at a set of lights actually lasting for four weeks (before they're put away to mysteriously fail before the first weekend of December 2012) and the cards are consigned to the Morrisons recyling bin. Yes folks, Christmas is over for another year, most of us are back to work - although no-one told a certain bus monopoly which has been operating a limited service since Christmas!

Anyway I digress. We need to take stock, to clear the decks, to declutter our minds and detox our bodies, and generally catch our breath after the Christmas rush.

What we do not need is Easter eggs on the 5th of January! Not so much egg-on-face as in-your-face the minute you walk into your nearest supermarket. And don't even start me on the Valentine cards...

Why can't we just let time pass naturally?

* I do love Mini Eggs, so that's the reason for the picture. Just don't buy me any till April :)

This time, we'll get it right

For some bizarre reason, I'm borrowing the post title from the England World Cup Squad football song from 1982. They weren't singing about Christmas shopping of course, but I thought it was an appropriate title tonight.

Today saw part 2 of my Christmas shopping bonanza. In 2011, I have decided to be even more organised than ever and get as much Christmas shopping done as early as possible. Today, like last Saturday, was very productive. A jewellery blitz in Next was followed by a card/gift bag blitz in Card Factory and then it was on to Boots for a 3 for 2 on Champneys spa stuff. Finally. I've moved on from all the Sanctuary goodies to something new :)

It's been a good weekend all in all. Last night, we finally made it to our favourite local Indian restaurant for my birthday meal, 2 week later than planned as I hadn't been too well around that time. Happily the work-stress is finally starting to ease off, but it's still the worst time of year for that....roll on January!

Did I hear jingle bells???

Yes it's the 17th of August.

SO WHY ARE THERE BOXES OF CHRISTMAS CARDS ON THE SHELVES IN BIRTHDAYS???

Sorry for shouting, but this kind of thing just makes me so grumpy and sends me into despair.

Christmas in August? Bah humbug. Some of us have still to go on our summer holidays.

So here it is, merry Christmas.

Yeah you heard right.

Today is 7th August 2010. To all intents and purposes it's still summer: people are still on summer holidays, works and offices are still not fully staffed, schools and colleges are still on leave and in denial about all the 'back to school' stuff in the shops, and although the nights are drawing in it's still light till 9.00 pm.

Whilst in our local branch of the wonderful Card Factory today, we spotted our first Christmas cards of 2010.

I really don't want to say any more :(

That happy post-Christmas feeling.

I hope you all had a great Christmas and that it was everything you wished for.

I had a very enjoyable time, no change to the usual Christmas routine but that's the way we like it! Got lots of lovely presents and also lots of money to buy some more goodies in the sales!!

We are still surrounded by snow: it's been so cold that last week's snow hasn't melted, and there are little daily top-ups of new snow too. The temperature tonight is forecast to drop to -5 degrees which is pretty cold for this country but that's nothing compared to other parts of the world which are much worse, and they just get on with it.

I haven't been out for a few days but will finally venture out tomorrow - wrapped up in my fabulous new cosy scarf which I got for Christmas - to check out the sales, which as usual will probably be rubbish and I'll moan relentlessly that there's nothing in the clothes shops but size 8s and 10s which they haven't been able to shift for months - however they may yet surprise me :)))

...IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!!

• Only 5 shopping days left. Do shopping malls really need to open till midnight? Why are people so disorganised? It's not as if Christmas has just appeared by surprise. We know it's happening, like, every year.


• As previously mentioned in 2008, my hometown has recycled the world's most insignificant Christmas lights for another underwhelming season. You know that your town's Christmas lights are seriously rubbish when neighbouring villages have better lights than your apology for a "town".


• Yet again I passed on the whole party night/Secret Santa/Christmas lunch thing and didn't feel like I missed out on anything. (Certainly didn't miss out on copious amounts of Quality Street scoffed with a couple of my colleagues whilst we covered in the office yesterday when everyone else was away for Christmas lunch.....!)


• This week I got some very lovely Christmas presents from my boss and friends at work and truly appreciate their warmth and friendship (and extremely good taste) - it's great to be part of such a lovely group of people and it's a pleasure to spend every working day with them. Here's my lovely big Yankee Candle set which already has pride of place in my living room:

• Mum and I had our annual trip to the panto today which was fab and funny and maximum entertainment. Oh yes it was!!!! That's one Christmas tradition which we always enjoy.


• Tomorrow = wrapping presents and then putting them all under the tree. So I probably won't really be around blogland till later tomorrow....


• One more thing - I'm now on holiday! Finished work yesterday and won't be back at my desk till Tuesday 29th!!!!!! Hoping to have a reasonably chilled out week.

And so, ladies and gentlemen, that concludes the Christmas shopping for 2009.

Yes they think it's all over....it is now.

Today I took some time out of work to go and do the last 'loose ends' of my Christmas shopping for this year. As usual, I've gone into control freak mode but it's been all very relaxing so far and the one thing I refuse to do is panic, unlike some people I could mention!!

In other news, I'm still feeling slightly under the weather, although finally getting better.

Being a Libran, 'indecisive' is of course my middle name, but once I bring myself to a decision it is set in stone and no going back. Last night I made a decision: I'm going to get a new mobile phone at the start of next year. One of those nice touch-screen ones, which do everything from taking good quality pictures and playing mp3s to possibly making the tea (well you never know.....).

As a tortoise would probably beat me in a texting competition, I wonder if a touch-screen phone would make me text any faster???? (Ummm.....probably not)

07.11.09. That would be Sir Cliff then, singing Mistletoe and Wine.

It's here.

Just the other day I happened to mention that there hadn't been any Christmas songs on, during any recent bouts of retail therapy. Good.

Until today that is. I decided to head off to the big city on my own, as today was a bit of a research trip - checking out what's on offer a) to buy for Christmas presents and b) to suggest to Santa what I might like....anyway it was a bit of a marathon which took its toll, so I'll be having an early night and not blogging into 2am or thereabouts. It was a pretty successful and productive day: the Christmas shopping has officially begun.

Now I love Christmas, so don't think that you have a bah-humbug thing going on here, but I think there should be an embargo on Christmas songs being played in shops until, say, the beginning of December at least. At this time of the year I feel really sorry for those who work in the retail trade, being subjected to the same old musical classics/turkeys (delete where appropriate) year after year.

Anyway I went into BHS and was greeted by..."Christmas time, mistletoe and wine" and my heart immediately sank. That's it started now, there is no escape until 25.12.2009. There's a lot to be said for iPods.

Talking of which, I called mine into action on the bus home, as I had the world's loudest man sitting behind me, yelling into his mobile phone for the most part of the journey. The best part was that brief few moments of silence when he lost the signal..... :)))))

Christmas = :))))

It was rather fabulous.

Spending Christmas with my loved ones: I can't ask for anything more.
And Santa was very good to me too :)))))

It's been absolutely wonderful. And as if that's not enough, we also had a great result at the Matalan sale today!!!

I'm just going to enjoy chillling out tomorrow before returning to work on Monday.