Four weeks in and one thing is very clear: my body is working against me and sabotaging itself. In the past four weeks there has been one very bad fall and some accident-prone bumps and bruises along the way. Finally, just a few days ago I accidentally bashed my left knee off my desk drawer pedestal at work, resulting in a lot of pain.
I also had a very busy week at home which meant that I never made it to the gym at all, however increased my walking to a minimum of 2 miles per day. I also got back on the exercise bike to try and pedal the pain away.
And then there was the dieting. I had a very good week, eating all the right things and cutting out the junk food. So by the time my Friday weigh-in came, I expected, finally, some good results.
Wrong.
For I had gained 2½ lbs. In one week. I don't even gain as much as that on holiday. In previous weeks, I felt pretty downhearted about gaining, or not losing. This week I just felt angry and frustrated, and wanting to just ditch it all for good. My boss suggested that the gain was probably due to building muscle, whilst one of my friends at work helpfully suggested that because I am now three years menopausal (which in itself caused a huge weight gain and a major down-turn in my physical and emotional health) and "of a certain age" that I might want to start feeling happy in my own skin and accept that this is how it's going to be from now on. I can understand that; people's bodies do change, and having gained a ridiculous amount of weight over a very short period of time, maybe it wasn't all just comfort eating. Maybe middle-age spread is a thing after all.
But I can't even blame genetics - no-one in my family is even remotely overweight, both my mum and gran were very slim at my age. And then I see people at the gym, who are a lot older than I am, who are in very good shape indeed. So I'm not giving up just yet, although dieting continues to depress me if I'm honest. Especially when it's not bringing results.
So a new week starts here - will this be the week when that turnaround finally happens? Answers in 7 days. In the meantime, in the immortal words of Rihanna it's time to work-work-work-work-work....
Update: An hour after writing this post, I returned to the gym for a 45 minute workout, followed by some improvised aqua-aerobics and a brief attempt at a swim - I managed a breadth of the pool (don't laugh, that was a major achievement!). That session this afternoon was very important: I tried out some new equipment including the rowing machine and a spinning bike. I also realised how much I like being at the gym, and that there is genuine enjoyment there rather than it feeling like a chore. Which is something to build on in the coming weeks.
No comments:
Post a Comment